(duplicity) ic contact

[demonicmiracle]

Hey, it's Anthony Crowley. You know what to do, do it with style.

Comments

[demonicmiracle]

I hardly like you that much

[brushoff]

Then we obviously need to get to know each other better—if only for Aziraphale's sake.

He adores me, you know. We've got pet names.

[demonicmiracle]

Adore is a strong word

[This is a dangerous game, Dorian. Crowley's been trying to be good, about not getting jealous, but it's not easy for a demon.]

What sort of getting to know each other did you have in mind?

[brushoff]

[ Dorian is the sort of man who plays chicken with the supernatural on a regular basis. He's also the sort of man who does NOT think things through. It's a dangerous combination. ]

That depends. Do you want to start slow or jump right into the thick of it?

[demonicmiracle]

I almost want to ask what the latter would involve, though I'm sure I'll regret it

[brushoff]

I WILL be in the market for a new Dominant the month after next.
Alternatively, sex. The latter could just involve far too much sex.

[demonicmiracle]

Absolutely not, I'd not trust you as far as Jon could throw you and I'm not ending up in Realignment 'cause you pissed off the wrong person

[Just picking a random, weak human, since theoretically Crowley could throw him very far.]

Is there a food you don't hate, but you wouldn't eat it if you had a choice? That's how I feel about sex, most of the time.

[brushoff]

[ Why is it that all the interesting people don't care that much about sex? Is he cursed? Dorian thinks he might be cursed. ]

Jon can give you a glowing recommendation if you want a reference. We won't end up in Realignment.

Pity about the sex, though. You don't know what you're missing.

[demonicmiracle]

[If they cared about sex they'd have fucked him already and he wouldn't be interested anymore.]

If only I trusted a single thing out of Jon's mouth

Do you really think you're all that interesting?

[brushoff]

I know I'm all that interesting.

[demonicmiracle]

[The problem here is that his inclination to not share anything about himself (and Aziraphale, in turn) is at war with wanting to convince Dorian there's really nothing that can compare to what he's already got going on.]

Well, I'm afraid I'll have to continue missing out. Barring the city getting in the way again, but you'd be best off hoping that doesn't happen

[brushoff]

The city always gets in the way. I'll make you mine sooner or later.

[demonicmiracle]

[yikes!]

Let's not get too possessive, yeah? You'll make it weird

[brushoff]

Why do people keep calling me possessive? You're the second person in a short time that said something like that.

[ says the man who can get way too possessive. ]

[demonicmiracle]

[Wow it's almost like there's a common thread here.]

You just said you'd make me yours. That's a bit possessive

[brushoff]

It really isn't.

[ Yes it is. ]

Honestly, I think you're overreacting.

[demonicmiracle]

Right, well, for the record and on the off chance it wasn't obvious, I already very much belong to someone

[brushoff]

I got that message loud and clear when Zed tried to cockblock me.

[ when Aziraphale succeeded in cockblocking him, you mean. ]

The two of you can't be monogamous, though.

[demonicmiracle]

Not sure I'd use the word "tried" when it was very successful cockblock

Why couldn't we be?

[brushoff]

1. The idea of a demon being monogamous is a little unbelievable.
2. I think the city itself has something against monogamy. Being dosed with aphrodisiacs, expected to sleep around, put in very compromising positions on the whims of our overlords. You almost fucked me. I doubt it's the first time that's happened to you.

[demonicmiracle]

What, I'm a demon so I just have to sleeping around a lot?

[How rude. Why do so many people have this stereotype. They've clearly never seen Hastur.]

What happens with the city hardly counts. We can't control that, it isn't like choosing to be with someone else

[It used to be slightly more complicated than that, but with Martin gone, it doesn't really matter anymore. Crowley has no interest in sleeping with anyone else, and he doubts Aziraphale does either.]

[brushoff]

Isn't sleeping around part of the job description?

[ just accept the fact that Milton gave all demons/fallen angels/whatever a glow-up, accept your lot in life, Crowley. ]

Glad to see that the two of you have figured that out. Jury's still out on how long it will last.

[demonicmiracle]

I think I'm the only demon in my world that's ever had sex

[Which is honestly for the best. Again: Hastur.]

Most people here seem pretty wise to it, I'd have had a lot more

[He decides not to touch on the latter part of that, it seems safer to leave it.]

[brushoff]

The rest of the demons in your world know they're missing out, right?

[ Because sex! Sex rocks! ]

[demonicmiracle]

Who are they going to have sex with? Humans? Each other? That has no appeal to them