Four hundred years of human history, give or take. Should've known that'd spark your interest, I'll go get it.
[It lives on the bookshelf in his bedroom, so it's only a quick trip up the flight of stairs that lead up to the mezzanine level, before he's returning with the leather bound book.
It's lightly burned, the same state it was in when Crowley rescued it from the burning bookshop, which explains the wariness in his expression as he hands it over.]
Be careful with it, that's the only thing I've got from home.
[From Aziraphale is what he means, but he's not saying that out loud.]
Your sunglasses are from home. [Just pointing it out. But Jon sets down the tea and takes the book with something akin to reverence. Books are some of the most notable objects the Institute collects, after all. He'll find the nearest place to sit down and carefully examine the cover before opening it up, fingers tracing the binding.]
[It's different, the things that he creates out of firmament compared to something made the hard way. Crowley's glasses are all indistinguishable from each other, he has a half dozen pairs scattered around the flat, all of them drawn into existence from the ether.
His phone is from home, he supposes, and it was made properly, but that's not the point.]
Nah, there's nothing magic about the book, s'just words on paper now. All the magic was in the witch and she's long dead, I'd think, being from the sixteen hundreds as she was.
[Jon's all but giddy at that. He nods, moving to open the book to a random page.]
'When Orient's chariot inverted be , four wheles in the sky, a man with bruises be upon Youre Bedde, achinge his Hedde for willow fine, a manne who testeth with a pyn yette his hart be clene, yette seed of myne own undoing, take the means of flame from himme for to mayk ryght certain, together ye sharle be, untyl the Ende that is to come.'
[Jon squints at the page.] The means of flame. Is it... some sort of willow tree arsonist? [Understanding cryptic prophecies isn't one of Jon's secret skills, unfortunately. Not without a little assistance from the Watcher.]
[Crowley's had a chance to properly read through the book without Hastur or the apocalypse interrupting in the past few weeks, and he's spent some of that time deciphering them just for the fun of it. Some of the prophecies are obvious, he picked out the ones that he was mentioned in quickly enough, and ones about the general state of the world were easy enough. The more specific ones are trickier.]
Willow bark's an analgesic, good for headaches before humans figured out aspirin. And the woman who owned the book last, she was at the airbase during the whole Armageddon business, had some lad with her wearing a witch hunter coat, that'd explain the pin and the flames.
[If you say so, Crowley. Jon will skim through the rest of the book quietly unless the demon prompts him. He does bring out his recorder and start muttering some of the more interesting prophecies into it, especially the ones he thinks he can decipher. He's very intent and focused.]
Could be something about Apple computers. Fascinating that a woman from the 1600s could have predicted that tech boom.
[Crowley, used to Aziraphale disappearing into books quite often, is more than happy to drink his coffee and mess around on his phone while he waits for Jon to do some reading. An alternative would be to let Jon take the book to read at his own pace, but — he'd rather keep an eye on it, honestly.
He does feel the need to pipe up when he hears Jon mention Apple.]
She called it on betamax tapes, too, I'd heard that one earlier. It was good luck, too, ended up investing a bit in VHS when that whole thing kicked off, made a lot of money in the seventies.
[Aziraphale had mentioned the prophecy in the 40s, after Crowley rescued him from the Nazis.]
[Jon was born in 1987, and Martin is the one into retro technology. Although, Jon is the one holding an analog cassette recorder up to his mouth and chattering away into it. VHS sort of clarifies.]
Oh. That's what they had before... right. Where did her prophecies come from? God?
Not a clue, never met the woman before, I tried to steer clear of all that witch hunting business.
[Oh, sure, he had Shadwell and his people on the back burner if he ever needed them, but that was well into the 60s, when no one was actually burning women alive anymore. At least not in England.]
You'd have to ask God, and She doesn't take calls.
Was a bit more concerned about not letting the world get destroyed in a war between the forces of Heaven and Hell. And not getting myself destroyed in the process.
[In his defense, he did only have the book for a handful of hours before he gave it back to Anathema.]
Had to get through the M25 after I sort of accidentally turned it into a burning ring of fire. [You know, as you do.] Didn't really have time to stop and put it out, so I just kept the car together for the drive.
[In case it was ever a mystery exactly how many brain cells Crowley has: the answer is one.]
[This is, in fact, the first time Crowley has been asked this question, because usually people don't actually get to hear much about his powers. The only one is Aziraphale, who operates in the same way.
He considers it for a second, then shrugs.]
I, uh, well. [Hm!] I'm a demon, aren't I? Logic's for humans, really. I've always sort of just done whatever.
You're patently ridiculous. Plants that are afraid of you, wings that appear and disappear, sunglasses inside or in the middle of the night, driving burning cars down the M25. Honestly. [Jon tuts and shakes his head before he turns a page and starts reading again.]
And people think I'm odd. [That's muttered with a scoff.]
Well. I'd be interested in reviewing your book in its entirety, but in the spirit of not spending several hours invading your flat, maybe I could look at more of it later. If you'd like to bring it to the Institute?
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[It lives on the bookshelf in his bedroom, so it's only a quick trip up the flight of stairs that lead up to the mezzanine level, before he's returning with the leather bound book.
It's lightly burned, the same state it was in when Crowley rescued it from the burning bookshop, which explains the wariness in his expression as he hands it over.]
Be careful with it, that's the only thing I've got from home.
[From Aziraphale is what he means, but he's not saying that out loud.]
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Are there any effects from reading it?
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[It's different, the things that he creates out of firmament compared to something made the hard way. Crowley's glasses are all indistinguishable from each other, he has a half dozen pairs scattered around the flat, all of them drawn into existence from the ether.
His phone is from home, he supposes, and it was made properly, but that's not the point.]
Nah, there's nothing magic about the book, s'just words on paper now. All the magic was in the witch and she's long dead, I'd think, being from the sixteen hundreds as she was.
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'When Orient's chariot inverted be , four wheles in the sky, a man with bruises be upon Youre Bedde, achinge his Hedde for willow fine, a manne who testeth with a pyn yette his hart be clene, yette seed of myne own undoing, take the means of flame from himme for to mayk ryght certain, together ye sharle be, untyl the Ende that is to come.'
[Jon squints at the page.] The means of flame. Is it... some sort of willow tree arsonist? [Understanding cryptic prophecies isn't one of Jon's secret skills, unfortunately. Not without a little assistance from the Watcher.]
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Willow bark's an analgesic, good for headaches before humans figured out aspirin. And the woman who owned the book last, she was at the airbase during the whole Armageddon business, had some lad with her wearing a witch hunter coat, that'd explain the pin and the flames.
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[If you say so, Crowley. Jon will skim through the rest of the book quietly unless the demon prompts him. He does bring out his recorder and start muttering some of the more interesting prophecies into it, especially the ones he thinks he can decipher. He's very intent and focused.]
Could be something about Apple computers. Fascinating that a woman from the 1600s could have predicted that tech boom.
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He does feel the need to pipe up when he hears Jon mention Apple.]
She called it on betamax tapes, too, I'd heard that one earlier. It was good luck, too, ended up investing a bit in VHS when that whole thing kicked off, made a lot of money in the seventies.
[Aziraphale had mentioned the prophecy in the 40s, after Crowley rescued him from the Nazis.]
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[Jon was born in 1987, and Martin is the one into retro technology. Although, Jon is the one holding an analog cassette recorder up to his mouth and chattering away into it. VHS sort of clarifies.]
Oh. That's what they had before... right. Where did her prophecies come from? God?
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[Oh, sure, he had Shadwell and his people on the back burner if he ever needed them, but that was well into the 60s, when no one was actually burning women alive anymore. At least not in England.]
You'd have to ask God, and She doesn't take calls.
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[What is Jesus up to these days? Crowley should ask Aziraphale.]
In all honesty, I'm not even sure God does have that much precise knowledge.
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Could have done, I dunno. Sometimes these things just happen, the world's full of mystery and wonder.
[He's the worst.]
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[The absolute worst! Jon is looking mildly aghast.]
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[In his defense, he did only have the book for a handful of hours before he gave it back to Anathema.]
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Hmph!
[He falls quiet again, going back to reading.]
Have any of her prophecies been wrong that you know of?
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Could have been, but everything I could make sense of checked out. She even knew the Bentley would be on fire when I drove to Tadfield.
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Why was your car on fire? Why were you driving your car while it was on fire?
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[In case it was ever a mystery exactly how many brain cells Crowley has: the answer is one.]
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[He shouldn't be so skeptical considering things he's seen, but honestly.]
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He considers it for a second, then shrugs.]
I, uh, well. [Hm!] I'm a demon, aren't I? Logic's for humans, really. I've always sort of just done whatever.
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You're patently ridiculous. Plants that are afraid of you, wings that appear and disappear, sunglasses inside or in the middle of the night, driving burning cars down the M25. Honestly. [Jon tuts and shakes his head before he turns a page and starts reading again.]
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Again, demon. That's not even scratching the surface of the things that're weird about me.
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Well. I'd be interested in reviewing your book in its entirety, but in the spirit of not spending several hours invading your flat, maybe I could look at more of it later. If you'd like to bring it to the Institute?
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[It's not like he's wrong.]
Sure, if you don't mind my hanging about while you read it.
[He's not leaving it alone, even in the Institute.]
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