anthony crowley (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
demonicmiracle) wrote2020-12-13 08:02 pm
demonicmiracle) wrote2020-12-13 08:02 pm
(apocalypse how) ic contact
Hey, it's Anthony Crowley. You know what to do, do it with style.
Hey, it's Anthony Crowley. You know what to do, do it with style.
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[He almost regrets not spending more time there, since maybe he'd have a better idea of how things work compared to England, but then he would have had to spend time in America, so it likely wouldn't be worth it.
As for fetching an employee, Crowley groans at Aziraphale's departure, muttering something about how unnecessary that is, but he still shoves his hands into his pockets and dutifully follows after him.]
Don't forget you can't get 'em to answer questions with a snap of your fingers.
[Which is to say - don't forget if they fuck up pretending to be human, they can't miracle it away like they're usually able to.]
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Not his business, surely.
Crowley gets a tut. ]
My dear, it's a couple of practical questions, not an interrogation. [ Is that the state of store interactions these days? Going by the number of criminals trying to run an insurance racket on him in the past few decades alone, yes. ] Ah! Excuse me. Hello.
[ "...hello."
People who look appropriately confused to be approached by their whole Aesthetic mix: Katherine in Menswear, who was re-folding t-shirts. No one has ever been more valid than Katherine.
What can I help you with?" ]
Yes, we were wondering if you could point us towards the henleys. [ Aziraphale has used his power of being able to make any word sound like he's never in his life either heard of it or needed to use it before. The power of not knowing how not to be weird. ] He's quite certain of what he wants already, but we're not used to the layout. I'm sure you understand.
[ Call your crush particular without calling them particular just to be petty about them telling you to remember you can't magically alter perceptions if you fuck up. He throws a quick glance back Crowley's way. ]
Actually, was there anything else while we're at it?
[ This, at least, is less to be petty and more for the sake of asking. ]
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(He wouldn't have, he would've just wandered around until he found what he was after.)]
Angel — [It's a bitten off attempt to stop him, both because he realizes it's futile, and because he's become suddenly aware of what it sounds like when he addresses Aziraphale as angel.
It's not that he hadn't know before, but it's so ingrained that he sometimes forgets how humans use the word.
@ Katherine in Menswear: help.
He wrinkles his nose at Aziraphale, for both the pettiness and putting him on the spot, but he decides to be at least a tiny bit mature and actually answer.]
I'm gonna need t'find jeans at some point, I suppose.
[He'd prefer to pop over to the women's section for that, but wearing men's jeans for now won't kill him.]
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Anyway, he does nothing to make this new experience less mortifying. The general consensus is that Aziraphale is now the most embarrassing person in this department. ]
Ah. Yes. Suppose those are important. [ Wait. ] Are you going to start wearing blue jeans?
[ What does this have to do with literally anything right now. Nothing. He's not even offended, he's just mystified by the concept.
Katherine cannot pull Crowley out of the mortifying social trenches because they are both down here, comrades in arms. But she can jump in front of a metaphorical bullet for him by cutting in before he has to answer.
(It's at least 70% because she's worried this is headed to 'one of them is willing to publicly talk about his husband's butt and the road is paved in denim' territory. Unacceptable.)
"Why don't I get you guys to the jeans to start? Then I can, uhh. Circle back about those henleys when I find them." People who are not usually deep in the paint in Menswear? Her. Things she adds very specifically for Crowley: "They have skinny fit?" ]
-- that would be very helpful, thank you. [ Aziraphale's dumb ass still finally realizing the ramifications of wardrobe flexibility. ]
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Friendship ended with Aziraphale, now Katherine is his new best friend.
More accurately, no one is his best friend because he's decided to be cranky about the fact she decided to point out the skinny fit clothing. He's aware he's skinny and also knows how clothes work, thank you very much.
Acting like a sullen teen about clothes shopping is something that can be so personal.]
Lead the way, then, love.
[The love is directed at Katherine and is a tiny bit condescending, though it's probably softened by the accent. Americans are weird about accents.]