demonicmiracle | (duplicity) ic contact

[ jon had hurt him, and it probably isn't normal for martin to just accept that it's going to happen. jon isn't his previous boyfriends. jon loves him, jon doesn't want to hurt him. and crowley's right, no matter how much martin's instinct is screaming at him that he should apologize for being upset with jon.

he probably will anyway, but.. he's hoping they'll at least talk. maybe lay down some ground rules. martin doesn't deserve being lied to, right? ]

I.. [ he's grateful for the arm over his shoulders, staring down at his blurry reflection in his glass. all his stupid freckles and his weird.. everything. ] It occurs to me that I'm-- I'm not really sure how to be in a relationship that isn't.. [ abusive? christ. ] .. bad.

[Something in Crowley's useless heart twists at the admission, and he leans in to press a kiss to Martin's hair.]

I haven't any real advice for you there, I'm sorry. [Not for the lack of advice, really, he's more sorry that Martin hasn't had anyone treat him the way he deserves to be treated.] But you're allowed to have emotions, yeah? It's alright if something hurts and you're mad about it, that's not unreasonable. You don't just have to take it. That's not what love is.

[ that's exactly what love has been for him for most of his life. he loves people, they hurt him, and he just sort of.. takes it. as a child, he hadn't had a choice. as an adult, he hadn't known anything else.

and then there's jon, who'd been mean to him, then softened, and now tries to protect him. sometimes he has no idea how to react to him, or how to talk to him, or how to be with him. of the two of them, martin is the one with more relationship experience, and all of his has been.. not good. ]

I'm-- I'm going to talk to him about it, [ he decides a little shakily. ] I just.. have to figure out how. [ he pushes his face into crowley's shoulder. ] Love is hard.

[It isn't a surprising decision, by any means. Crowley doesn't think there's a whole lot that Jon could do that would drive Martin from him completely.]

You've plenty of time to figure it out. [He doesn't say that Jon deserves to at least stew in his mistake overnight, because that'll probably just make Martin feel guilty about it.] Take it easy tonight, hm? Get a bit drunk, fall asleep in the bath, try not to think about Jon being an idiot. I'll even let you put on some awful nineties pop music, if you want. That's nostalgic for you, isn't it?

[He doesn't know how to talk about love or shitty relationships, so he's hoping that he can go this way, instead. Lighten the mood a bit to cheer Martin up.]

[ he grins at the pop comment, gently elbowing crowley and then taking another sip from his glass. ] Getting drunk sounds amazing right now. Hopefully some making out with you will be involved in there somewhere.

[ he leans up to kiss him, taking his time to do so thoroughly, then pulls back with a smile. ] Have I mentioned I love you? [ he grabs his bag with his free hand. ] I'm going to go run a bath and finish this glass.

Obviously, that goes without saying.

[He hadn't been sure if there was going to be any making out, actually, since he doesn't really know whether that's the sort of thing Martin would be in the mood for, while upset with his actual boyfriend.

But clearly it's fine, since he's kissing Crowley, who's more than happy to kiss back and — grateful for it, actually, when Martin drops the L word again. He's distracted enough from the kiss that he doesn't immediately lose his hold on his wine glass. Thank someone for small mercies.

His mouth betrays him for a second, unsure what to say, before he decides to just... skip past it.]

There's, uh — I've got all those herbs and oils and things, if you want to toss something in the tub to properly marinate yourself. Poke around if you'd like, there's nothing in the bathroom you can't see.

[He doesn't like anyone, even Martin, poking around the bedroom, but that's really the main space that Crowley considers private. The only thing in the bathroom is overpriced and unnecessary skin and hair care products.]

Thanks, love.

[ he offers another quick smile, and heads toward the bathroom. he dumps his bag by the door as he shuts it lightly behind himself and starts the water. his glass goes on the side of the tub, and he does take a few minutes poking around for some nice bath oils or something. when he finds something he likes the smell of, he pours it into the nearly scalding water and then strips, sliding into the tub with a sigh.

he probably really is going to doze off in the warmth. it's been such a long day. ]

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